Fifteen: The story of a Birthday Boy

The following text is a narrative I wrote for my birthday and to thank the people who wished me a Happy Birthday on my birthday yesterday...
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"Happy Birthday" is what we want for our birthday. Only idiots will believe that it will be given in any manner of sincerity. It is a celebration filled with deception and spurious characters. He has seen it all. He sees through the mask that obfuscates the true feeling of the people around him.


Even now, he was stranded in his friend group looking at his phone, blinding the calendar just escaping his social anxiety and worries into the world of Social Media.


"Your Birthday is next week !!" his friends reminded with an enthusiastic pitch.

"Oh yeah" he replied with a pessimistic tone.


With the friends excited, they started to plan while he sat there worried at the trouble they'll bring and the endless lies from the celebration. He was annoyed as his wish never came through, as though people still remember his birthday and all it's fake words that he worries about. He had never understood the meaning of the day where he felt it is just another empty day that is restricting his work.


He then left, went home to isolate his mind, a lady Macbeth of his own constantly convincing him to believe the worst.  His heart was opposite, his heart was optimistic and hopeful. The heart knows the comfort he needs, it knows the love he wants from his friends and the trust he lacks yet he always lies and denies the heart. The minds became a dictator stopping his feelings to rebel.


Everyday his heart wants to rebel yet the mind stops it and punishes his heart for its rebellion where it causes a piece of the heart to shatter. piece by piece it comes out, but it never gives up. The thought that surrounds his head and the voice that curses at him with the pain that the heart that shook him in tears. The pain he felt on his drenched pillow and lack of the comfort of his friends wishing them replying " It's okay I'm here." 


He was alone in the room of heartbreak that people saw as a bedroom. In a home where he sees as a torture chamber. He was stuck as him without freedom and understanding of the meaning of friends or life or anything he questions the world. He then blinked


The window shines in with it's warmth that he rejects. He kept his air condition on to keep his heart cold and preserved to prevent it from hurting. Leaving it and stopping it to be healed leaving the scars as wounds. He was ignorant at this point, rejecting the life he is in, rejecting the words people say to him and rejecting the truth that is shown in his eyes. He just wanted things to end but it never did. 


6 days he thought. 6 days until the day where it will feel like eternity. The day where people send a text with empty meaning. Same old text that could've been "How are you" or "Are you okay" but it is just a "Happy Birthday!!" He never seemed Happy in the day and still he hates the word birth as if he wished that never was true. 


As the same days go, day by day. Woken up by a dark figure, eyes sore. remembering the past nights of heartbreak that he no longer can hold and the times that he had fallen to the floor in a disheveled heap as his grief poured out. The amount of hate he feels that he wants to jump off a building to reach the heavens in seconds rather than waiting  84 years of human life. He was just feeling as if he was a puppet. Used, played with ,ignored and only interacted when the other wants something out of it. He never sees it as a time for fun and enjoyment.


5 days, 4 days, 3 days ,2 days and now it is his birthday eve. It was a day where it was what had become his "normal" day. A day where he never knew or believed to be true. He tried to stay quiet to keep thoughts to give clues for his "friends". He was just invisible, he thought. He will be the one where no one will understand or know why or what is happening so they will not celebrate. His hope of everyone hating him so the words never reaches him. He is just now becoming someone his mind says he is and just became a coward as his heart. As he slept he ignored his phone, silent its noise to keep the piece into the room of voices.


He soon woke up, woken by the alarm of lullaby. The glance of the warm sun and the feeling of comfort hits him for the first time. It was his birthday. He grabbed his phone and looked. An empty screen that he imagined to a screen with more than 15 notifications. Each with a Happy birthday text and a wish that they gave him. Pictures of memories hung in the walls of social media. He smiled. He continued his day, online days through school that spoke through the speakers that spoke knowledge. His heart had healed. His mind had weakened.


"HAPPY BIRTHDAY" the class shouted. He was confused, he was shocked yet his heart believed. His heart had started to beat again and it finally had blown off the dust and as a machine moved again he had felt loved again. Still his mind started to speak. It started to command. Commanding for his authority and his royalty. Hopeless he was, he pressed the button and left. 


As the clock strikes 4 he leaves home to a place he may feel more comfortable than home, a center where he loved and felt happiness yet learnt knowledge. Seeing his friends and friends, his heart finally strikes its sword into the mind's negativity. It shined a feeling of comfort through his body. Even with only a minute, he had felt love that he never felt for some time. 


He had finally understood the meaning of Birthday. Even when it is a day of birth, it signifies the chance you had to survive in the world. It is the day that fate has written you into. It is the life that god has picked you into and the journey that you have allowed yourself to conquer and change the mistake into memories and experience as a reward. He sees that the day is a day that reflects the good he had put into the world and the day where his love he lacks comforts him and the words he wished come through. 


Birthday is a word he now understands and cherishes. It is a day where he finally loves and cherishes. As he was now, happy again. He thanked everyone who gave him love and wrote his story "The story of a Birthday Boy".




Thak gaya hun main dard chupate-chupate










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